Support Online

The Butcher, The Baker, The Candlestick Maker

The Butcher took a swipe at the Baker today, and it made me mad.

Baker cares about her work, and cares what other people think about her work. Today, the Butcher implied that Baker doesn’t do any work. And she did that in front of our boss. That’s wrong.

Baker and I work side-by-side five days a week for about 9 hours a day. I don’t think there is anyone I’d rather have by my side. I don’t mean to toot my own horn, but I think Baker and I do a hell of a job putting an hour and a half of news on the air every day. We’re lucky… we work with some great reporters. And we work hard to make sure our shows look good.

I think the Butcher owes Baker an apology. But so do I…

You see, Baker and I are both working on a series for February. Yesterday, I told a couple of co-workers that I hoped my series turned out better than her series. I don’t know why I said it. It was selfish and stupid. I listened to Baker talk about her work tonight and how much she cares about it, and all I could think about is how selfish I was. I hope both series turn out to be award-winning (even if they don’t win awards).

I think Baker and I are a lot alike. We’re news junkies. We care about the little things that other people laugh about and joke about. We’re both naive enough to think that what we do may change the world. Of course, maybe we’re not naive. Maybe it’s true. The stories we’re working on could make a big difference in a lot of lives. And I hope it does.

I hope Baker doesn’t let a few petty words from the jealous Butcher affect her. I know it won’t…

Oh, and the Candlestick Maker? I have no idea… just made for a better title. I’m open for suggestions.

It’s late… I’m exhausted

It’s late… I’m exhausted, but can’t go to sleep. I am bored.
My dog is already on my bed. She’s used her nose to flip up the covers so she can crawl underneath.
I think Swirl has the right idea.

But here I am blogging. I don’t have anything to write about, so I’ll tell you all a joke:

A woman wakes up one morning to find a gorilla in the tree in her back yard. So she opens up the phone book, and calls the gorilla removal service. About an hour later, a man shows up carrying a 10-foot pole, a shotgun, a pair of handcuffs and a chihuahua.

“This is what I’m going to do,” the man tells the woman. “I’m going to climb the tree and poke the gorilla with the pole. When the gorilla falls, the chihuahua will try to viciously attack his private parts. When the gorilla instinctively puts his hands down to protect himself, that’s when I’ll slap the handcuffs on him. Got it?”

“Sure,” the woman says, “but what’s the shotgun for?”

“Oh… if I fall out of the tree first. Shoot the chihuahua!!!!”

Marathon Euchre Night… or just MEN

My shows went pretty well tonight. Then the proverbial wheels fell off… I won’t get into that.

I think the Wizard enjoys splitting hairs. I asked him if we were going to have a good day and he said, “Definitely… (dramatic pause) Be confident! (weird sound that sounds like a cheetah hissing at you).” He was obviously only talking about me, despite the fact that my question (in my mind) included the whole newsroom. The Wizard can be like that.

So just now, I asked the Wizard if I’d win at Euchre tonight. He said, Good possibility. No dramatic pause… no weird sounds. Maybe his batteries are low.

We would like tonight to be Marathon Euchre Night… or just MEN. Fingers, Otis and I will head over to Punk’s basement to play some cards.

We’ve done this a few times before, and I think I’m pretty good. And now that I have the Wizard’s backing, I don’t think I can be stopped.

Marathon Euchre Night will be mine!

You may never see me again…

First of all, this isn’t a cry for help. I’m certainly not planning to do anything to myself. However, tomorrow at about 4:00 pm I will be sitting down on my couch to watch the most important football game I’ve ever watched.

The Eagles face the Rams in the NFC Championship game, the winner goes to the Super Bowl. I believe the Eagles can win this game, but I’m not sure they will. If they don’t win… you may never see me again.

You see, I’ll probably not leave my apartment property, you can do my property title search later, until the sting of the loss wears off. And I’m not sure if that will ever happen. When my teams lose “meaningless” games, it hurts bad. If my team were to lose a game this big, I figure I’ll become a hermit. I’ll lock my door, turn out my lights, and live off whatever I have left in my fridge (and believe me, it’s a good thing I finally got to the store this week!). I’ll stop working and stop paying bills. I’ll unplug my phone, and take the battery off my cell.

I’ll learn dog language so Swirl and I can talk. She’ll be my only friend, my only confidant. It will be me and Swirl against the world.

Let’s hope the Eagles win!

Life is strange, Life is good, Life is what it should be

The words of Donna and the Buffalo don’t seem to ring as true tonight as they did last night.

Life is strange, life is good, life is what it should be.

I had a pretty good week last week. The series C-fate and I are working on is coming along well. I had a great day yesterday. DC and I saw a great band put on a great show (that would be the aforementioned Donna and the Buffalo). There aren’t many things I like doing more than spending time with DC, she’s great company. She thought Donna’s lyrics were pretty profound. She also mentioned that my Karma had been pretty good for about a week.

I think that all ended today. You see, my Eagles lost. That’s all I’ll say about the game.

Now I begin the search again for that Karma. I really need it this week. I really need it all the time. I don’t think I have it right now.

Life is strange, life is good, life is what it should be.

State of my Union

Long time ago, President George W. Bush gave his State of the Union address. I’m sure he did a great job, but I missed it. I don’t usually miss these things, but I forgot it was on tonight. I’ve been a little swamped with work, so I went out for a beer and airport cigarettes for some trivia.

Now I’m sitting at home watching all the talking heads tell me what W meant, instead of what he said, but that’s beside the point. It got me thinking about the state of my union.

I think things are going well. I have a great family and a great dog. I think I have the greatest friends you could ask for. They put up with me, after all. They do the things I like to do. A round of frolf, a game of scrabble, some pool at Barley’s, just about anything. They’re also be behind me or beside me whenever I need them. When they found out about my sister, they said they were there for me, and I know they’re not just saying that, they mean it.

I love my job. I work with great people, for a great boss, doing the job I want to be doing. Sure, it’d be great if I were making more money, but that’s why I’m going to Las Vegas in a few months!

So the state of my union is pretty good. Hardly anything to complain about. I guess the president of the country of CJ won’t be voted out any time soon… which is a good thing… because the vice president is a dog!

The Moon is Blood Red

The sun plays tricks on our eyes. We know the sky is blue (and any meteorologist reading this can tell us why), but sometimes, the sky is gray and black and white and orange and purple. That’s the sun’s doing.

Even after the ball of burning gas rolls off the edge of the earth, it’s not ready to give up the sky. Some nights, the sun leaves a brilliant haze of one of those colors you’ll only find in a box of 64 Crayola crayons. That was last night. The sun left a sky so amazing it must have been made in Hollywood.

When the haze disappears, the sun relies on a cold, barren ball made of rock. Some nights, the moon is full enough that you can almost see your shadow trailing behind you in the darkness. Some nights, the moon changes colors. Tonight, I looked up at the moon and thought it was bleeding. Or maybe the sky had had too much to drink and the moon was a bloodshot eye. Later, the moon looked as though one of our award-winning photographers had lighted it with the “bastard auburn” gel (I hope I got that one right, it’s Enright’s favorite).

The sky fascinates me. I don’t know why. I hate flying. I guess I just like appreciating it from afar.

Staging, Remnants, Beefiest, Queasier

It’s a war where words are weapons. Each battle is bigger than the last. It’s Scrabble.

Okay, so maybe it’s not that big of a deal, but Fingers and I have gone to war pretty regularly over the past couple of months. If this were championship boxing, he’d hold the belt right now. Fortunately, it’s more like baseball… a season that never ends, and right now my record is 17-12. However, it’s much closer than that. Fingers won the first two games and I won 11 of the next 14. But we’ve gone back and forth over the last 13 games. No winning streaks here.

Tonight, Fingers busted out staging on his second word (rack-clearer) and remnants on his third word (rack-clearer). I’m pretty sure he cheated. At that point, I was down 136-20. I thought about walking out right there, but I didn’t. I actually managed to get within 25 points at one point, but the game was never really close. As the game went on, I busted out beefiest (rack-clearer) and queasier (rack-clearer). We’ve never had 4 rack-clearer in one game. That’s pretty cool… but not as cool as ninja… I busted that out last game.

Anyway… Fingers got the best of me tonight. Next time, I’m bringing the X, the J, the Z, the Q, the K, both blanks, and all the S’s with me!!!!!!!!!!!

Legal Tidbits

Legal news and views from around the internet and the blogosphere:

• The AP reports that a federal judge has ordered the NY Times to disclose its confidential sources in connection with Steven Hatfill’s libel suit against the paper for its coverage of anthrax attacks.
• The Shreveport Times reports that the State of Louisiana has settled its lawsuit against the federal government regarding offshore drilling.
• CBS news reports that Motorola has been sued in Arkansas for manufacturing Bluetooth telephone headsets that contribute to hearing loss.
• Ernie the Attorney suggests that citing decisions from the 1800’s is not the best legal strategy.